I teach 3 days a week and have a fairly large group this session (67 on the roster- most days we average about 45). These ladies are so strong, so humble, and teachable, and willing to try new things. And so I want to keep coming up with new challenges for them.

I spend a significant amount of time each week researching new exercise moves, choreographing songs to use with them, and planning whatever my Biblical teaching/message will be for that week. This week, with it being Holy week, I wanted to really put together something amazing.

I began to struggle. And stress. And strive. I wanted to make my Easter teachings be so good, that I started to miss the point. I started to make it about ME and what I could deliver to these ladies. Without realizing it, I began to strive to add to what Jesus has already came and done.

At Revelation Wellness we have a saying- “Just deliver the pizza”. What that means basically is that my job is to deliver the Good news of what He has already done. That’s it. My job isn’t to try to market the pizza to the people that come, my job is not to add to the pizza to make it better, and my job is not to make the pizza myself. My job is to deliver and then to get out of the way.

And this week, I missed that. I made it about ME and not about Him and what He has already done.

So God took my voice. Literally. I’ve been sick with allergies for several weeks now, but this week He took my voice and on Thursday I could barely make a squeak.
Which is when it hit me that I’ve been going about this thing all wrong.
My job is to deliver the Good news, not to create Good news. Anything, ANYTHING good in me came from Him. ALL OF IT. And when I start to get in my own way and to make it about me, God lovingly disciplines me and shows me a better way- HIS way.

So I confessed. I poured out all of my yuck and ugliness and asked for His forgiveness. And I prayed that if it be His will, that I could speak to lead my class today. If not, I determined I would still show up and lead with visual cues, but today, He gave me the voice I needed to say the message He gave me…

And it wasn’t a big, 4 point Easter sermon- it was transparency. It was grace. It was sharing with my group how I had failed and missed the mark. How I had been striving and making it about me instead of about Him. And how the Gospel message is that He came and did the work for us because we never could. We will never been “good enough” on our own and all that we have that IS good is because of Him.

It was a sweet time of confessing and repentance and I really feel like He was glorified.

It may have taken losing my voice for me to finally find the RIGHT voice- HIS.

I’m grateful.

Friend, if you don’t know Jesus and you’re ready to surrender, there is NO better time. You don’t have to be good enough, you don’t have to clean up your life before you can come to Him. HE alone makes you enough. Please contact me if you need help learning more about how to find your way to Jesus. He’s waiting on you, right now.

Confession #1: Truth is, with so many fun things happening over the last few months, I’ve slipped back into some bad habits.
I began to use these fun occasions as an excuse to indulge, then the next day finding another reason, then another the next day. The same old familiar cycle would start.

Friends, there will ALWAYS be a reason to indulge if we’re looking for one. Always.

And I do not believe that indulging in and of itself is bad.

But when I’m doing it often and then losing some of the freedom I’ve gained because of it, that’s a problem.

I began to make poor choices and then return to the negative mindset that held me captive for so long. And although I’m not going to go into detail right now, know that if allowed to continue, I would be right back where I was when this journey began- trying to reduce and restrict and earn my worth through my outer appearance- my mask. And that is not what God has for me- that is not what He has for you, either.

I cannot help lead you into a place of freedom in which I do not myself stand, so I’m getting back to basics with you.

Tomorrow,
I WILL drink half my body weight in ounces of water. I will start off my day super early with some quiet time and then go lead my local ladies in a
good workout/worship session. I will NOT tell myself that I deserve a
Reeses peanut butter egg (really, not tomorrow- no sir, no way), and I
will plan my meals and snacks so that I can nourish my body in ways that
make me have energy and feel free.

And if I fail- I’ll give myself some grace, but get right back on track. I will look to HIM for my worth and let Him tell me how to move and to eat and to love and to live.

Confession #2- I’ve really slacked here in this space. I’m not disappointed in myself because truly, I’ve done all that I can do, but I do intend to do better. So I’m setting out a new plan.

On January 1st I invited you to join me in a Back To Basics challenge where we would focus on a new healthy habit every 21 days. Many of you joined me initially and made it through the 1st habit: Water.

From there we moved on to Exercise, Getting enough sleep, and finally sugar.

And truth be told, it’s just been more than I could keep up with and I wasn’t able to keep giving you new info each week for each habit. We’re supposed to be getting ready to start week #3 of our focus on reducing SUGAR, and I’ve only posted once on that topic.

So I’m changing plans.

From here on out for 2015, we will have one habit PER MONTH and we’re going to use the month of April to go back and master our first 4 habits: Water, Exercise, Sleep, and Reducing Sugar.

Each month I’ll introduce a new habit that we will add in to the ones we’ve already mastered. You can jump in at any point, or go back and start from the beginning.

Here are all the posts from the beginning:

WATER posts here, here, and here)
EXERCISE  posts here, here, and here
Sleep posts here and here. And here.
And I posted once about SUGAR and you can find it here.

On April 1st I’ll have a calendar posted that you can print off and some instructions on how to use it each day. I think it will be a good tool for us to keep us on track and help us get back to some healthy habits.

So,  this is me,  telling you that I haven’t been walking what I talk, or practicing what I preach like I need to be to lead you well.
And I’m ready to return.

Are you still with me? Can we do this thing together?

As always, our pursuit of gaining more of HIM is always worth it and I will be here praying for you and cheering you on!!!

Hope: the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best:

Have you ever been in a situation in which you had no hope?

I HOPE not, but chances are likely that you have.

I think about 1 Thessalonians 4:13 which says, “13…so you will not grieve like people who have no hope.”

I am so grateful that no matter how bad things get, I have HOPE because I have Jesus.

But the truth is that hundreds and hundreds of thousands of people do not.

They don’t know that there is an answer to every problem. They don’t know that there is a way to have the peace that surpasses all understanding. And they don’t know what joy they are missing.

An Organization called CityServe launched an initiative called HOPEFEST which began as a group of pastors and churches that sought out opportunities to be more present in their communities.

CityServe Arizona’s HopeFest event in Phoenix brings the community together to
meet the immediate needs of our uninsured, under-insured and under-served
neighbors, and then connects them to resources that facilitate long-term
solutions, independence and stability.

Through a collaboration of
helping agencies, organizations and individuals,  thousands of people
receive FREE medical, dental, vision, food, housing, haircuts, clothing,
personal care products, employment services, child safety needs and so
much more.

Along with those services that they are getting at this event, they are also gaining HOPE.

Revelation Wellness is a sponsor of this event and shows up each year to offer people the HOPE that is gained through Christ alone.

The first time I watched this video, I cried. When I watch it now, I still cry.

As you’ll see when watching it, they aren’t just teaching these people a few new exercise moves- they are MOVING in LOVE. They are showing others that they are valuable, and created by God, and worth loving.

And it’s beautiful.

For RevelationWellness to be able to show up and to serve the community in this way, they need our help. If you visit this site you’ll find more information about this event and how you can help.

Bottom line: they need our support. For a donation of $25.00 or more you will be helping to GIVE HOPE to those who desperately need it. You’ll be helping them to be the hands and feet of Christ in a real, tangible way. Annnnddd, you get a cute shirt in exchange. What’s not to love?

Will you do me a favor and at least go visit their site and read more? And if you didn’t already, GO WATCH THE VIDEO I posted above. I know you’ll see what I do when I watch it- Jesus with skin on. Once you get to about the 1:30 mark you’ll start to tear up. By another minute in my guess is you’ll be crying and by the end you may have the ‘ugly cry’ going. You’ve been warned but it is WORTH it!

Thank you for your hearts, friends, and for how you help build up the Body.

I am so very grateful for you and that you choose to meet me in this space.