Kara

9 years ago today…

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Nine years ago today I became a Mama.

I had read all the books, bought all the gadgets that were supposed to make child-rearing easier, gotten advice from women around me, decorated the nursery, and had done what I could to get ready. But NOTHING could have prepared me for the adventure that was to come.

When Our sweet girl arrived on the scene,  life as we knew it before ceased to exist. 

Our days were filled with middle-of-the-night feedings, diaper changes, acid reflux medicines, temper-tantrums (from the baby and from me), nursing and bottles, morning walks with the stroller, snuggles before bed, and adhering to the schedule we thought would make parenting a fussy challenging baby easier.

We were consumed with doing it all “right” and with following all the guidelines we had researched from the so-called “experts”.

And y’all, if I’m being honest here, there were days I didn’t think we would survive it.
She cried all day. Every day. Even feeding her was a battle.

I can remember multiple times sitting with friends or family over coffee or desert and literally crying saying how I just didn’t think I could do it and how something must be wrong with me.

I struggled with postpartum depression and anxiety, with the loss of my former identity, and with being home all day with a baby that didn’t seem to like me.

As she grew, I would take her to baby massage class, toddler storytime, and playgroups with other moms. Almost every time while the others kids were laughing or playing or sitting quietly and listening, she would cry. She would throw a tantrum in the floor or completely disrupt the group activity. I thought that we would never survive the whirlwind of raising this little firecracker.
Truly.

Looking back now, I can see how irrational fears, impossible expectations, and some serious hormonal imbalances were all working against me.

The enemy tried to convince me that something was wrong with me as a Mom, with her as my daughter, and that it would never get better. 

But God. 

He sustained us.
He carried us through moment by moment. He slowly and gently began revealing areas on my heart and life that needed to be surrendered to Him. Places where I had allowed selfishness and pride to rule and reign on the throne of my heart.

He taught me how to love the child that He had specifically designed for me and not to try to use someone else’s method or plans.

That same kid who was so strong willed that I couldn’t take out in public without an incident is now one of the kindest, most obedient, delightful, full of life kids that I know.
She is literally MY JOY most days.

I look at her now and see no trace of the battle that used to rage inside of her heart and mind. Probably, because He changed the lens through which I was viewing her. And I also know that the Lord has changed her heart, too.

I know some will see this post and be shocked and offended that I would post that I struggled with being a mom. (Please don’t misunderstand me- I am GRATEFUL with every single fiber of my being to be a Mom.) 

But I also know that someone out there reading this right now, might breathe a little easier, take a big sigh of relief and know this: YOU AREN’T THE ONLY ONE.

Hear me, weary sister: IT GETS BETTER. 

Those battles you’re fighting right now, this very second when it’s your will vs. theirs: THEY ARE WORTH IT.

Those prayers you’re praying on your knees in desperation crying out for deliverance and wisdom: THEY ARE HEARD.

Those days when you don’t think you have what it takes and that you can’t keep going: THEY WILL PASS.

And those struggles you’re facing that make you question everything about yourself and your ability: THEY ARE SHAPING YOUR HEART TO LOOK MORE LIKE THE FATHER’S.

It will get better. IT WILL.

Right now, set your gaze on the race the Lord has given YOU to run. Not on the one that your friend is running to your left, and for heaven’s sake, not the one that the lady to your right is running who keeps giving you advice on how to make your kid act differently.

You were given this child to raise. FOR A PURPOSE. It wasn’t a mistake. On your own you may not have enough wisdom, enough strength, enough patience, enough endurance, but CHRIST DOES. Let Him teach you. Moment by moment, day by day.

You aren’t alone, and right now, I’m praying for you and CHEERING YOU ON!

Press On For the Prize (Guest Post from Kasey Shuler)

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I’m not quite sure when I first came across Kasey Shuler, but y’all, she is SERIOUSLY legit. She has amazing content, a heart that loves the Lord, and so much knowledge and wisdom about how to effectively train your body!
Everything I’ve ever encountered or read of her content has blessed my heart and has left me inspired by the goodness that the Lord has poured into her.
This past April, I got to meet her as she came through Instructor Training for Revelation Wellness, and she is every bit as amazing in person. She’s pretty tiny, but this girl TAKES UP SPACE for the Kingdom. I’m so excited to be able to share my online corner of the world with her today and to bless you with her wisdom.

“Press On for the Prize” 

I recently competed in my first strength competition. The events included a dead lift, sled push and tire flipping, clean and press, farmer’s carry, and sandbag throws. I’m tiny, and it was tough. I decided a month prior that I would start training for it, and my workouts from then on revolved around that competition. I made sure to practice all my lifts to the best of my ability during each session and recovered with intention (AKA asking hubby for massages and begging baby girl for more sleep).

 

Usually, I workout because it gives me more energy and lifts my mood. But I often feel aimless and do what I feel like doing instead of pushing myself to work harder. I deprive myself of experiencing the joy of growth and progression.

 

Imperishable Wreath

 

This time, I had a purpose. I started to understand Paul when he talks about running to receive the prize:
“Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable.” 1 Corinthians 9:24-25

 

By training my body for a competition, I was teaching my soul what it looks like to press on for the prize.

 

All runners run, but only one receives the prize. I do not live just to get by. I want to use everything I have for the glory of God. Focusing on the prize and not yielding to distraction is true ambition.
Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. When I was in the month-long training season, I abstained from alcohol because I knew it would wreck my sleep patterns. I rearranged my schedule to make it to my pre-planned gym sessions. I prepared post-workout protein drinks and stayed away from processed sugar. My flesh wanted to be lazy and indulge in Dairy Queen blizzards, but an inner drive for the goal stuffed selfish wants in favor of self-control. The spirit is wiling, but the flesh is weak (Matthew 26:41). 

 

They do it to receive a perishable wreath…One of the athletes that inspires me is track and field Olympian Alyson Felix. When asked about how she chooses her meals, Felix responds, “Nutritious food makes me feel good and perform well. Processed and junk food makes me feel tired and bloated — not a gold medal feeling!”* Everything she does is for that medal. But the medal will fade and the crowds will forget. These are perishable prizes.

 

but we an imperishable…For the Christian (whose name means “belongs to Christ”), the ultimate prize is wholeness with Christ the King, owner of all the crowns. His death on the cross paid our ticket for the race, so everything I get to do is a free gift.
Everything for the Prize

 

Let’s follow Paul’s advice and imitate the life of an athlete! Let’s run the race with self-control and do everything for the prize of wholeness in Christ.

 

The question we can continually ask ourselves is, “How can I express my thanks for the Lord?” We are only in the race because of Him, and He prefers our gratitude over gold medals.

 

If I first present myself with this question before I pick up my phone first in the morning during my scheduled training time, I know what my heart’s answer will be. The test of faith is whether or not I will obey. But if I can keep the prize in view by reminding myself of what Jesus has already done for me, listening to the life-giving gentle voice of the Lord will become easier. It will become a part of my character, a part of me: “And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation” (Romans 5:4).

 

A competition not only sets you up to train your mind, heart, and soul, but reveals the strength of the Lord. On a good day of training for the strength competition, I could only perform 8 deadlifts at 135 pounds. The day of the meet, I did 28 deadlifts in the allotted 60 second time period. I say that only to give glory to the Lord, because it was only through His grace and the cheers of my competitors that I could have done that. I did not win the first place prize, but I still felt like I won. I had fellowship with people, felt at one with the Lord, and whole in my being.

 

 

Reflect and Respond
Do you have any fitness goals? How do they help you grow as a person?
Have you considered a life goal? Seek the Lord and ask Him what His purpose is for you.  

 

Footnote
Mazziotta, Julie. “Olympian Allyson Felix’s Food Diary: What I Eat in a Day.” PEOPLE.com. July 14, 2016. Accessed December 18, 2016. http://people.com/food/allyson-felix-food-diary/.

 

She’s every bit as amazing as I told you, RIGHT?!?!
If you want to follow her online and learn more about her ministry and her book “Love Beyond Looks“, you can find her at:
www.kaseybshuler.com

The SUMMER MANIFESTO for Mommas

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Last year, right before Memorial Day, I felt the same old issues rise up in me. The same battle…the same struggle as all the years before.

It’s the struggle of wanting to be fully present with your kids, yet being distracted by your own body image issues. It’s  the pull on your heart to fully soak up each moment with them, yet wanting to stay hidden under your coverup on a chair at the side of the pool. It’s looking at the women around you and sizing up your worth based on your comparison to how they look or act or achieve or earn.

I get it.  I struggle with it.
AND YET I REFUSE TO STAY THERE.

The Lord gave me words to declare out loud, over my own heart, and I put them together into a Manifesto.
The definition of the word Manifesto: “a written statement declaring publicly the intentions, motives, or views of its issuer”.

So I wrote it. And I declared it.
And it helped me find some freedom.

So this year, I’m claiming it again. Before we launch into Memorial Day weekend, and another Summer with our kids, I am declaring that I WILL NOT MISS it this Summer. I WILL REFUSE to be distracted, discouraged, or defeated by things that don’t matter. I’m declaring it, and I’m praying that YOU are bold and brave enough to do so, too.

I hope you will read it, share it, and to declare it over your own life.

It’s time for things to change, friends. We will no longer be those who are so consumed with the way that we look that we miss the moments with our families. NO MORE. NO LONGER.

The SUMMER MANIFESTO FOR MOMMAS:

I will refuse to be more concerned over the way I look in a bathing suit than the fun I can have with my family.

I will celebrate the gift of working legs instead of worrying about the amount of cellulite they may hold.

I will GET IN THE POOL when my kids ask instead of hiding beneath my cover-up.

I will show my daughter that a FREE woman isn’t valued based on her physical appearance.

I will show my son that his Momma is BRAVE enough to be AUTHENTICALLY HERSELF in a world that keeps screaming at her to be more, do more, have more, and to shrink smaller and smaller.

I will celebrate the moments I am given FREELY and FULLY instead of being worried over what may be bulging, jiggling, or hanging over my waistband.

I will SEIZE THE DAY knowing that eating ice cream cones with my kids may not be the “healthiest” choice, but it may very well be the RIGHT one in certain moments.

I will LIVE as the LOVED daughter that I am and will cling to the truth that I am fully known and fully loved and that it’s not dependent on anything I could ever do on my own, anyway.

I will CALL OUT THE GOOD in the women around me.

I WILL BUILD UP.

I WILL CELEBRATE.

I will CHEER ON THOSE who are also bravely pursuing freedom even while baring all of their self-perceived flaws to others.

I will REFUSE to let the way I THINK I look in a bathing suit or a pair of shorts to keep me from fully enjoying the gift of time with my family.

I will DECLARE that I am ALREADY ACCEPTED, ALREADY LOVED, and ALREADY ENOUGH because of JESUS.

I will BELIEVE (and repeat to myself!) that my kids care far more about a Momma that is willing to play with them having fun than if I have six-pack abs.

I will stop staring at my phone so much and will look UP at the beauty right in front of my face.

I will stop striving and hustling to earn my worth.

I will let myself off of the hook.

I will remove my mask and live FREE. Flawed but FREE.

I WILL ENJOY these days and these fleeting moments.

——–

Mommas-
DECLARE IT. SHARE IT. OWN IT. LIVE IT.

If you’d like a PDF file so that you can print this truth and post it around your home, you can do so by clicking HERE.

To watch the video, click HERE.

Sharing Our Successes: Meet Cayle!

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It’s been a WHILE since I’ve posted a new SHARING OUR SUCCESSES post. Today, I am SO excited to introduce you to Cayle.

Cayle is a member of our At-Home Tribe and I get the honor of leading not just her, but also her Mama! They sometimes post their post-workout sweaty selfies together and it always blesses me. Cayle is a Senior and is graduating High School THIS Friday! She’s a sweet girl on a journey to honor the Lord with ALL that she has-including her health journey.

I’m excited to feature her story here, because it shows you how small, sustainable changes can lead to so many benefits down the road!

I’ve invited her to write about her journey for you, and I pray that it blesses and encourages you.

——–
I was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) in 2014 the summer before tenth grade. I always wanted to be that “skinny girl” but I had the mindset of that if I eat healthy for 3 days then I’ll lose five pounds, and I always got devastated when I stepped on the scale and instead of losing weight, I either gained or stayed the same.

For me, it was always about the number whether it be weight or clothing size.

For most of my tenth grade year I did nothing to change my life style. When eleventh grade rolled around I was doing dual enrollment so I had a very flexible schedule. I was not disciplined and I would eat out 2-3 a week just for lunch. It was not until this past fall, which was the beginning of my senior year that I wanted to get healthy and stay healthy.

One of my main reasons is because I will be going off to college this year and I needed to learn self discipline and be accountable for my food actions. I’m not going to have my mom buying healthy groceries every week or telling me what I can/can’t have. It’s time for me to learn for myself. I also wanted to get healthy because I do not want to be 18 and have diabetes.

Last fall was really tough with applying to college and trying to figure out where on earth I’m going to attend. Thanksgiving was really hard for me. We took family pictures and after looking at them, I cried. I did not like the way I looked in the pictures and I was determined that I was going to change.

I started watching my portion sizes and actually lost a couple of pounds, but when Christmas rolled around I gained them all back. It didn’t help that I would be bringing in the New Years in Jacksonville at a Bowl Game or going to Passion in Atlanta where we had to get good on the go. For a solid week I didn’t have one home cooked meal.

The second week of January I realized that my body is a temple to God and that everything that comes from my body needs to glorify him, including the food I eat. I started working out with my mom more using the At-Home Tribe videos, and cutting back on the portions. That’s the biggest thing I have had to change is to eat a smaller amount of what I’m eating.

I also don’t snack as often as I used to. A year ago if my stomach growled I automatically put unhealthy food into it, but now if it growls I drink water and if I am truly hungry I opt for something like a piece of fruit or cheese stick. In my car, I try to keep an extra bottle of water and a pack of almonds with me in case I keep hungry.

The biggest part I struggle with is being an on the go family. Both of my siblings are involved in sports and my dad coaches, so some nights the only way we get dinner is if we eat out.

One trick I have learned is to get a kids meal, or to get a regular meal and not eat it all. I used to go to Zaxbys and get a Kickin Chicken Sandwich and I would eat the entire meal fries and all. Now when I go there, I get the Zax Snack and I usually don’t eat it all. It’s the same with Chick-Fil-A. I opt for their grilled chicken nuggets and fruit cup instead of a sandwich.

Every now and then I’ll splurge and get the sandwich, but it’s not something I do very often. My mom and I try to implement a M, W, F workout schedule because my brother and sister have practices/games on T,Th, & S.

A big motivator for me to get healthy is being able to have kids when I get older. Having PCOS, I will have a difficult time getting pregnant and my doctor tells me all the time that losing weight will help me tremendously.
Since January, I have lost 10-12 pounds. I’m not down a clothing size yet, but my clothes are definitely looser than they were a couple of months ago. I have arm muscles!! 🙂 I started out at a 5 pound weight and now I’m using 10 pounds and on my way to 12 pounds. My blood pressure has improved as well as my insulin levels. Overall I have so much more energy and I’m able to make it a full day without getting tired. I love love love drinking water, so I definitely get in my daily allotment of that. A big struggle for me is wanting to drink Diet Coke, but I have been able to cut back.

The encouragement I have to offer is to JUST START. For me, starting the workout is always the hardest, but I love the feeling I get afterwards. Starting to eat less was hard, but I survived. Starting to eat healthier was harder, but I don’t regret it at all. You won’t regret any of these things, but I encourage everyone to start. You don’t know what you’re capable of until you do.

 

The Lord has definitely shown me patience through all of this. I have had to learn to listen to my body. My self-confidence has grown tremendously. I no longer have that big double chin which made me hate taking pictures. Nowadays I love taking pictures and I love showing off my smile. I started looking at myself as someone that the Lord has made in His own image and someone that He pursues! Once you look at yourself in that way your perspective of yourself does a complete 180. My favorite verse is Esther 4:14 and it says “that maybe we were made for such a time as this” and I believe I was.

Cayle and her sweet Mama. So fun to see them workout together!

Thank you for sharing your story with us, Cayle! We are SO proud of you and grateful for the example you are living.

Congratulations on your journey and on your High School Graduation!!!

Slow Cooker Pepper Steak

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After looking through several recipes online, I created this version of Slow Cooker Pepper Steak. Three out of four of us loved it, and I thought the leftovers were even better than on the day that we made it. It was super simple and we served it over frozen cauliflower rice that I just cooked in the microwave. Simple cooking at its best!

Ingredients:
London Broil (Mine was around 1.5 lbs and it fed 4 of us with a little left over)*It’s much easier to slice it if it’s partially frozen when you cut it.
2 green peppers, sliced in strips
1 TB Sesame Oil
1 tsp salt
1 tsp pepper
3 tsp minced garlic (I used the refrigerated kind in the jar)
1 can beef broth
1 package mushrooms, quartered
2 onions, sliced lengthwise
2 TB flour (or cornstarch or arrowroot powder)

Directions:
-Chop veggies and place on bottom of slow cooker.
-Slice the partially frozen london broil (or meat cut of your choice) against the grain. Basically, look for the direction the grain seems to run in the meat and then turn it 90 degrees and cut it that way.  This will make the meat more tender.
-Put the sliced beef over top of the veggies and then add all other ingredients except for the flour (cornstarch or arrowroot powder). Stir it all around if you’d like.
-Cook on low for 7 hours, then turn UP the heat to High.
-Whisk together 1/4 c cold water and the flour. Add to the slow cooker and stir to combine.
-Cover and cook it a little more until it starts to thicken up.

We served ours over top of this amazing riced cauliflower. I hate preparing my own because I don’t love the smell of cooked cauliflower, but this frozen version is GOOD! My kids even love it!