Dear Daughter,
Yesterday, you looked at me with your five-year-old head tilted to the side and said that you would not be eating lunch. You matter-of-factly stated that you “want to be thin” and that you think you are “Fat”. Oh my sweet girl, hearing those words from your innocent little mouth took the breath right from me.
To think that even at five years old you are already struggling with the concept of being too much of this or too much of that…it breaks my heart. I need you to know something. I need you to believe with every fiber of your being the words that I am writing to you now, so that in years to come when the world tells you differently, you will not fall for their lies.
Dear one, you are beautiful.
You were formed and fashioned by the same hands that crafted the galaxies into existence. Every detail of your body, your hair, your nails, your talents, abilities, and personality were specifically given to you, to fulfill a purpose that no one else can. You will be told by the media, by your classmates, by your ‘friends’ that you must fit a certain mold to be beautiful. THIS IS NOT TRUE, sweetheart. You are amazing just as you are. Whether that means you are a size 22 one day or a size 2- it is absolutely no indicator of your worth and your beauty.
The way your eyes sparkle when you’re excited, how you fold your hands while you’re watching tv, or how you crinkle your nose when you are trying something new…it’s perfect. No amount of beauty, perfect physique, or incredible talent will help cover up an ugly heart- and my dear, your heart is beautiful. I want you to focus on that.
Instead of looking at magazines that tell you to concentrate on having six pack abs, the newest hairstyles, or a thigh gap, focus on finding ways to make the world around you more beautiful. Continue doing things like you already do- sharing friendship with those that need it, holding hands with your brother when he’s afraid, singing songs and twirling through the kitchen full of joy. Dear girl, nothing else will matter more than having your heart rest in knowing that the God of the Universe loves you, and because of that, we can share that same love with all around us. No matter what anyone else tells you, know that you were formed and fashioned to do big things. And I know that you will. One day you will change this world- you have already changed mine.
Your Daddy and I love you- we’ve loved you from the moment we knew you would be joining our family. We’ve prayed for you to have a happy heart and a sweet spirit every single day since you were born, and that is exactly what God has given you. There is no room, no time, no place in your life for the lies that you will be told. I want you to know that taking care of our physical health is important, solely because it was a gift to us from God and we need to honor that. NOT BECAUSE you want to be a certain size or shape.
Just as you are valuable, remember that those around you are too. Some may look different than you, act different than you, or even make choices that are very different from you. Always remember that they too were formed and fashioned by God for a specific purpose and our role is to love them right where they are.
There will most likely be times in your life that you question the position you have been given- why you are made the way that you are, why you are placed in the role that you are, or why bad things have to happen. Know, sweet girl, that nothing happens by accident. No thing can come to us that God can’t o use to develop us into what He wants for us to be. And you, my girl, are going to be amazing. You have been since you were born.
You are loved. You are enough. Just as you are.
Love,
Mommy
Elaine Hall says
Absolutely perfect! Exactly what every girl needs to hear and believe, and maybe there would not be so many girls and women with distorted body image issues. And what a beautiful world it would be if we all would remember every day that we are formed and fashioned by God for a specific purpose, and our role is to love our neighbor as ourselves.
Tiffany Nagy says
Love Love Love this letter and she is so lucky to have you as your mom! God has specifically anointed you to speak life and health into others!! You keep pursuing your destiny… He will not disappoint and He will bring you and those around you to NEW levels!! xo.
Lellen says
Kara,
I'd add one more culpret to the list of liars. When I was struggling with image at a young age, the biggest liar of them all was me. It was me that convinced myself I wasn't enough, and that is the scarriest thought of them all. We must shut out lies of the world, but somehow I pray your little girl can tame the lies within. Good start with a great mom.